Building Relationships Through Love

A few days ago, members of the Spiritual Life Commission - a group of parishioners who work on the Advent Retreat, Lenten Quiet Day, the Wednesday Evenings in Lent series, and the weekly Prayers of the People, among other spiritually nourishing events. Their work is vital to the spiritual growth and development of each of us, and I have found great value in this particular ministry.

Having served in several congregations before coming to Christ Church, it is only here at Christ Church that we have a dedicated corps of parishioners who write the Prayers of the People for our Sunday worship. These prayers more than speak to us and about us; they provide a real-time reflection of what’s going on in our lives and in our world. And so, as chaotic as our world may be, these prayers calm our nerves and assure us of God’s presence. As turbulent as our lives and world may be, these prayers comfort and strengthen us for the task ahead of us.

Gathering with our fellow parishioners was incredibly joyful. It uplifted my spirit to hear of where we are and where we desire to be as fellow pilgrims on God’s path. The big deal is that we walk together on God’s path. We labor together on God’s path. We support each other on God’s path. We hold hands together on God’s path. We lift each other up on God’s path. And it is essential to know where we are on that path and how long we must go, so that we are not deluded into thinking more of ourselves than we ought to think. Listen to the words of the first letter of St. Paul to the Church in Corinth: So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!

After prayerful deliberation, we settled on the theme:

Building Relationships Through Love.

We picked this theme because of the profound hope in seeing everyone connect with everyone in this congregation. We desire to see others develop a connection with everyone in this congregation. Our goal is for all of us to create lasting relationships with everyone in this congregation. But we can only undertake these tasks through love.

There were more than a few texts from scripture that helped us in our deliberations. But the one that stood out to me was John 13:35: By this, everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.

It is important to me, and I am sure to everyone within this congregation, that as people of faith, we look at each other through the prism of love. We must understand that there is no other way to connect and build without the gift of love. It is love that helps us to see. It is love that moves us to embrace. It is love that allows us to affirm. It is love that inspires us to engage. It is love that breeds the desire in us to want to transform a life. It is love that mitigates any selfish desires in our hearts and helps us look at each piece of our lives as being connected.

Just as what brings you life, brings me life, and brings all of us life, so does what hurts you, hurts me, and hurts all of us.

There’s a story of a Rabbi, Yisrael Meir Kagan. He lived during a time when train travel was revolutionizing the travel industry. The Rabbi once observed a peasant helping himself to some of the steel that was lying on the ground for the rail track. He said to him, “What are you doing?” The peasant said, “Listen, Rabbi, steel is a valuable commodity, and I don’t think anyone’s going to miss this solitary piece of track.” But the Rabbi said, “It’s a train track. It’s needed.” The man countered, “Thousands of miles of steel tracks have been laid. This one piece of track won’t make a difference.” I'm sure that we can all appreciate the inherent absurdity and the naivete of the peasant here.

But the problem is this: when you choose to do your own thing, thinking that what I do, what I say, and how I conduct myself is my business and doesn’t affect anyone else, just isn’t true. The opposite is, in fact, true because whatever you do certainly affects someone else. The trouble is, when you think you’re doing what you want, and that what you want makes no difference to others, the reality is you risk derailing everyone else in the process.

To the peasant, the track was a solitary piece of steel, but he failed to see that it was connected to other tracks. And so are you connected to other tracks.

Here at Christ Church, we pride ourselves on being a diverse congregation - it is truly a blessing. There are not many congregations like Christ Church. If others complain about 11:00 a.m. being the most segregated hour in America, that isn’t our experience. 11:00 a.m. at Christ Church is a reflection of God’s Rainbow of Love, a rainbow of different colors in which we have found great solace and comfort, and in the common table that welcomes each of us without exception.

Consider yourself a piece of steel on a rail track. The train cannot travel, nor can it get to its destination without you. If you consider yourself a steel track, it would be easier to see another person as a steel on a rail track. The connection between you and that person is the fishplates that hold both of you together. 

In our Christian language, the fishplate is love - and it is that one gift that we all have in equal amounts and through which we can connect and build lasting relationships.

Remember, we are all tracks of steel, and God’s mercy train can only get to its destination when we are not only connected by love with each other, but we build relationships of love, which then makes our ministry of life transformation possible.

And so, through love, stay connected through treasured relationships.

Manny+